The Week In Recommendations 5.8.24

Sexy movies and novels, the end of "Baby Reindeer," and more spring cleaning (and a little shopping).

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Claire has been reading… 📖

Some serious reading this week, as I’ve been following the news from Rafah in horror, and reading some related essays.

I read Elena Dudum’s deeply moving Atlantic piece, “I Am Building an Archive to Prove That Palestine Exists,” in which she details her grandfather’s and father’s different ways of preserving the memory of their homeland (reciting their family tree, collecting old magazine articles) and also her own, newer attempts to compile a record of a people often erased both rhetorically and literally: “This impulse is reactive, yes, a response to the repeated denial of Palestine’s existence, but it’s also an act of faith—faith that one day all of this work will be useful, will finally be put on display as part of a new archive that corrects a systematically denied history.”

I also read Julianne Escobedo Shepherd’s Flaming Hydra essay, “Met Offensive,” on the unfolding of the gaudy Met Ball spectacle amid the brutal Rafah assault: “The event’s dress code, keyed to a forthcoming exhibit at the Met’s Costume Institute, was ‘The Garden of Time,’ based on a J.G. Ballard story about a Count and Countess who dig into tradition as their palatial villa is gradually overrun by the dirty and rabble-rousing masses, suggesting that someone at the Metropolitan Museum of Art has a grim sense of humor.” Our work is based in the belief that culture is not apolitical, and yet Escobedo Shepherd’s piece prodded at my own fear that my work serves to distract from what really matters. Is the work I do worth doing, when children who are every bit as precious and beloved as my own children are being horrifically killed with the sanction and support of my government? I believe in the value of art, including the artistry of fashion and of campy reality TV and sentimental romances, and still I struggle with this.

So this week, while reading about Gaza and the student protests and the violent crackdown on the student protests, I was also rewatching “The Idea of You” and attempting to read the original novel version of it (and agree with Emma’s take, see below!).

Emma has been reading… 📖

The novel version of “The Idea Of You” in preparation for our Love To See It episode about the movie! I’ve seen a lot of criticism of the adaptation, predominantly from militant devotees of the novel. And I’ve gotta say, while I find Robinne Lee’s writing gripping — and definitely sexy — I actually enjoyed many of the changes that Jennifer Westfeldt and Michael Showalter ultimately made for the screen version. Can’t wait to discuss on the pod!

Also, like Claire, I have been attempting to make sense of the unfolding situation in Rafah, as well as the domestic struggles that have erupted on and off college campuses with regards to U.S. policy and the Israel-Gaza war. I feel like a broken record, but as a progressive Jew, I am sick about the death and destruction and imminent famine occurring in Gaza, and on a personal level, the way that it has cleaved my community right in two. I have stepped back from a lot of public discourse in favor of having in-person conversations with people that I trust — is this simply cowardice? I’m not sure — but I have found

Peter Beinart

’s Substack,

The Beinart Notebook

to be a great resource. It’s in his links that I was reminded of this 1999 op-ed by Palestinian public intellectual and writer Edward Said, reflecting on the deeply imperfect Oslo Accords:

“The idea of a state for 'ourselves' simply flies in the face of the facts: short of ethnic cleansing or 'mass transfer,' as in 1948, there is no way for Israel to get rid of the Palestinians or for Palestinians to wish Israelis away. Neither side has a viable military option against the other, which, I am sorry to say, is why both opted for a peace that so patently tries to accomplish what war couldn't.”

Claire has been watching… 📺

The end of “Baby Reindeer,” which rapidly got much darker and heavier than I had anticipated from the first episode — perhaps because of the wry narration, I did not realize this show about a stalker would turn out to be quite disturbing. And not only because the stalking got much nastier (as it tends to do), but because the show also quite graphically depicts grooming and sexual assault. As we finished the show, we also found news coverage about the woman depicted in the show, who has apparently come forward and identified herself, and who claims to be pursuing legal action against the show’s creator and star, Richard Gadd — yet another dark twist. Ultimately I found the show unsettling on many levels; it’s not just the content itself, but the thinly veiled identities of Gadd’s wrongdoers, which has made them tempting to search out, and his tendency to blame himself for somehow inviting or even allowing his own abuse. But perhaps that’s also partly what makes it so fascinating: the show seems both raw and ruthlessly self-scrutinizing, a flood of wounded feeling held together by its well-articulated scaffolding of shame.

I have also been watching “Selling the O.C.”, a show that is lacking entirely in rawness and self-scrutiny. More coming on that soon!

Emma has been watching… 📺

The rainy spring weather gave me a great excuse to go to the movies and see “Challengers,” the buzzy, sexy Luca Guadagnino-helmed film everyone’s been raving about. It’s a movie that I had to sit with for a day and process. All three of the leads — Zendaya, Mike Faist, and Josh O’Connor — are gripping, Justin Kuritzkes’ screenplay is sharply rendered, and the Trent Reznor score is bold and stressful in the best way. I’ve been fascinated that the movie has been marketed as a three-way romance, when Zendaya’s Tashi Duncan seems like a character that is incapable of love, unless it’s love of the game of tennis. “Challengers” is ultimately more of a psychosexual thriller, and a meditation on ambition and competition. I’ll be thinking about it for awhile. (I’ll also be thinking about the fact that Kuritzkes and his wife Celine Song are responsible for two of the most gripping pieces of art about a woman caught between two men in recent history.)

Speaking of in-person viewing, I got a chance to see “The Outsiders” on Broadway, and WOW. I went in with zero expectations, but I absolutely loved it. The cast is so deeply talented, the dancing is top notch — several of the cast members are professional ballet dancers — and the music is the stuff of great cast albums. Really think it has a shot at winning the Tony for Best New Musical!

Claire has been listening to… 🎧

In light of our recent dive into “The Valley” – my true introduction to the reality TV chaos agent that is Kristen Doute – I couldn’t resist the latest Celebrity Memoir Book Club episode, which covers her memoir/advice book, “He’s Making You Crazy: How to Get the Guy, Get Even, and Get Over It.” It seems to mainly be a long recounting of every guy she ever chased after, dated, and got dumped by (or, to be fair, dumped herself), and it’s giving me some fascinating context for the version of Kristen I’ve been seeing in her latest onscreen iteration.

Emma has been listening to… 🎧

Search Engine’s episode about the history and effectiveness of trigger warnings. I found this deep dive absolutely fascinating, and the way that host P.J. Voght included his own experiences with suicidal ideation in the episode was incredibly vulnerable. It made me think a lot about what content warnings do for those of us who use them and hear them, and how complex trauma triggers are. (And how when we are members of a certain political or ideological group, we tend to except cultural signals of that group without much deeper thought!)

Claire has been buying… 🛍️

Nothing this week! I’ve been trying to be extra disciplined, knowing that a torrent of Mother’s Day sales (from favorite brands like Tradlands, Storq, Christy Dawn and Dôen) and the Hill House summer drop are coming, and my budgeting resolve will be tested.

In an attempt to both declutter our tiny shared closet and remind myself of all the clothes I already have before I impulsively shop, I went through almost every item of clothing I own and got rid of so many things I’ve been hanging onto even though they no longer fit my lifestyle. As a bonus, I found some jeans I thought I didn’t like on me (the Madewell mom jean in Austrey wash, which is no longer available but can be found on resale sites here and there). Now that I have my dream high-rise denim, the Levi’s ribcage jeans, I am not bothered that these jeans don’t hit my belly button – they’re perfect for a casual-and-untucked spring look.

Emma has been buying… 🛍️

I too have been clearing out my closet as part of my constant low-grade attempt at spring cleaning. I took a bunch of stuff over to Consignment Brooklyn, put a handful of items up on Poshmark, and donated the rest. It feels good to be able to see more of what I actually have!

I did get a couple summer basics in Shopbop’s big pre-summer sale, like this Endless Rose pleated striped shirt, the Agolde Britt Tee, and this Miaou bodysuit. And Nelle Atelier — my short-girl denim obsession — sent me a pair of their new wide-leg jeans in Lapis, and I will be wearing these CONSTANTLY. At the brand’s suggestion, I sized up for a slouchier, lower, loose fit, and they are maybe the most comfortable jeans I’ve ever owned, while still looking properly tailored! Like what is this magic??? I’m planning to go to their New York City pop-up this weekend, and will probably buy the same pair in Pearl.

Claire has been making… 🧶

A lot of standbys this week – the Smitten Kitchen miso-tahini veggie bowls with roasted chickpeas, the Yasmin Fahr one-pot sausage pasta, tofu crisped in the air fryer and tossed with chopped roasted asparagus and a peanut sauce inspired by this Ali Slagle recipe, a batch of trail mix energy balls. The baby has just started to get interested in pincering up tiny bits of food – this week he tried the tofu (sans sauce) and sweet potato. 

On Sunday we made a simple brunch, just scrambled eggs and toast with berries, but it was a huge moment for me as a mom: my preschooler helped make brunch. He has been helping me cook for years, in the way a college intern is supposed to help – it takes longer to do it with him than me to do it myself, but it has educational value – but this time he cracked all the eggs himself and then chopped up the strawberries perfectly with his plastic knife while I scrambled the eggs. It was easier than making brunch alone. And he’s only four! There is something uniquely challenging about the firstborn experience for me, in that it’s hard to really understand how long it takes for little kids to learn certain things, so whenever he hits another milestone like this I feel a wave of pride in him and also a moment of realization. “Huh, I guess it makes sense that it took three years to learn how to do this, even though it felt endless at the time!” Anyway, he’s a chef now, and I expect to be hanging up my spatula within the year.

Emma has been making… 🧶

My new recipe of the week is Melissa Clark’s Rosemary White Beans with Frizzled Onions and Tomato. As a self-described sauce girlie, I love a hearty recipe that lives in the space between stew and soup, and begs for bread to be toasted and dipped into it. Plus, this particular recipe doesn’t require a ton of high-level culinary skill, which I certainly don’t have.

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